tenemos tiempo

this post won't make sense at least not today. in time it will and i'll expand on what i can't quite express tonight.

my mind is thinking...maybe too much, maybe not enough. sorting thoughts, ideas, hopes and dreams, mine, yours. sorting the past, mistakes, fear-based decisions, indecision, mine, yours. sorting the calendar, the passing of time, questioning it, accepting it, trying to understand it...not sure that is possible. what is yours? what is mine? what is ours?

i am floating in and out of dreams and reality.

plans are taking shape, lists are being made. some items are effortless, others will require hard work. finding a way to get there while still being here. much to do here. seeding what will come.

2 months is on my mind. it's been more than 2 months since this began. is this real? could you be new? because it was more than 2 months before this, that your heart broke. did it heal? and 2 months from now mine will, because you will be 2500 miles away for 2 long months. and yet, it is as it should be. i know this. truly. i believe this. is this the fear creeping in? i will let go.

my heart is feeling...maybe too much, maybe not enough. something is happening, something incredible, something unique. all the past we carry. reading your words from a different time, creates noise. words from this time quiet it. core values. our hearts are a big place. i realize we can have true amazing feelings that are real while also having those of heartache. must embrace pain. they can occupy our heart at the exact same time. co-existing.

"i'd rather feel, really feel this force between us for all it is than worry about what it might be tomorrow. " - bsa 1.13.08

"the planet is pulling us, letting go will get us there, let's not dream too long" - mow 2.25.08